Why is Parenting So Hard?

It has been an interesting week.  For some reason, this week, parenting has seemed EXTRA hard.  Lots of tears, testing, disobedience, and just plain hard parenting moments.  As I have been mulling over the week, I knew I would process best by writing.  So, here it is - just my random thoughts written down.  Someday, when my kids are older, I'll look back at this time and remember that it WASN'T just all the fun moments I usually include in this blog (which are my favorite things to remember), but definitely had its challenges too!

Why is parenting so hard?

Why do mealtimes have to be so hard?  Everyone needs something.  Can't get everything fast enough.  Everyone wants to talk.  Spilled milk.  Why can't you pick up the cup instead of letting it keep spilling???  Tears over disliked food. Demonstrative actions.  Spilled plate.  More needs.  I'm hungry too!  Can we remember our manners please?  Baby throws food.  Dirty floor.  Baby is done.  I haven't started. Why do mealtimes have to be so hard? 

Why do babies have to cry so much? Cry when set down.  Cry when don't like food.  Cry when hungry.  Cry when bonked.  Cry when can't chew on cord.  Or put finger in a socket.  Or put small item in mouth. Cry when can't be carried.  Cry when tired. Why do babies have to cry so much?  

Why are kids so picky? Don't like what is for dinner.  Sit and don't eat.  Or cry. Or talk about not liking the food.  Or talk about other food they want.  Or throw food.  Cry when eating food.  Cry because didn't finish food in time for dessert.  Why are kids so picky?

Why is it so hard to be happy? Frustration over tasks.  Because can't do a task by themselves.  Or because they have to do a task by themselves.  Tears about being asked to go potty.  Upset about having to stop a fun task.  Or start a new task.  Or do a chore.  Sad about having to walk.  Or not being able to walk.  Upset about not being able to go somewhere.  Or do something.  Or having to go somewhere.  Or having to do something. Why is it so hard to be happy?

Why do they have to get hurt so much?  And cry SO LOUD each time?  Literally scream bloody murder. Why do they have to fall so much?  And trip so much?  And bonk so much?  And run into things?  Why do they have to get hurt so much?

Why is it so hard to teach a kid to go potty? Why do they have accidents after being potty trained for so long?  Why do they have accidents even when they made it to the potty on time? Why is it so quick to have an accident and take so long to clean it up? Why is child constipation such a big issue and the pain so hard?  Why is it so hard to teach a kid to go potty?

Why do kids have to exert their own will so much? Why is it so important who carries it?  Or does it? Or holds it? Or pushes it?  Or ties or buckles or throws it?  Why is it so hard to be obedient? And do what mom says the FIRST time?  Why is it so hard to share a toy? Or let someone else pick the game?  Or let someone else go first? Or not realize all the work I do? Or make repeated requests of me to "drop everything and help me now"? Why are kids so self-centered?

 

Oh. Wait. I think they got it from me...

Why do mealtimes have to be so hard?  Well, why is it so hard for me to be willing servant? Without resentment.  Without complaining.  Without feeling as though I am higher or better or don't deserve what I am going through. As if I deserve to be waited on.  Why don't I follow the example Jesus set - he was servant to all. Why is it so hard for me to be a willing servant?

Why do babies have to cry so much? Well, why do I get frustrated so easily? Why do all the requests, the "why"s, and the endless "MOMMY!'s " that are just curious and natural and often sweet requests for help raise my blood pressure and leave me ignoring, answering sharply, or despising my own short answers?  Why don't I have patience and understanding for all the little requests?  Why do I feel that things are beyond my capacity when each time "it all works out"? Why don't I have more self-control over my words and actions? Why do I get frustrated so easily?

Why are kids so picky? Well, why do I get nervous outside of my comfort zone? Why do I get scared about trying something new?  Or failure?  Or what people with think?  Or not being successful?  Or that people might see me fail? Why don't I view new things as opportunities?  Why do I get nervous outside of my comfort zone?

Why is it so hard for kids to be happy? Well, why do I dwell on the negative parts of the day? Why are my first words to my husband often venting the frustrations of the day?  Why, when thinking back on the day, do I remember all the bad parts of the day and let them rule my thoughts? Why do the tough parts of the day take the forefront of my mind?  Why is my attitude so dependent on what has happened that day? Instead of who I am in Christ. Why do I dwell on the negative parts of the day?

Why do they have to get hurt so much?  Why do I let my feelings get hurt so easily?  And overlook people's good intent and go right to what they could have meant by their words?  Or think so much about what they should have said that I turn their words into something worse than what was meant.  Or predetermine what should be said and be disappointed when it doesn't happen.  Or consider my wants as needs and get hurt when they go unfulfilled.  Instead of going to God for my self-worth.  Why do I let my feelings get hurt so easily?

Why is it so hard to teach a kid to go potty? Well, why do I accidently make the same mistakes over and over again?  Why can't I learn?  Why do I have to keep rehashing the same mistakes again and again?  Why am I so slow to learn and end up hurting myself and others in the process?  And wasting time cleaning up my messes.  Why can't I learn from a mistake the first time?

Why do kids have to exert their own will so much? Well, why do I want what I want so much that it is so hard to put others wants ahead of my own? Or even to hear what others are saying?  Or even to stop and listen and consider another way to do something.  Why am I so quick to think my way is best and exert it? Why can't I be a better listener and put others first?  Why am I so selfish?

Wow, I'd imagine you would get pretty frustrated with ME as your child, Lord! Please help me to be the example I want to be for my kids.   Please give me grace when I mess up, and help me to forward that endless grace to my kids.  Oh, and lots of patience, too.  Thanks, Lord!

Amen